The Decision is Made

 I'm not sure when exactly I started thinking about becoming a truck driver.  My fiancee, Michael has a good friend who does it, so I have been hearing stories from the road for 2 years.  Then about 8 months ago, Michael decided that it was a career path that he wanted to try.  It didn't work out for him.  I've always enjoyed hearing the tales and the horror stories about people places and things from the road. 

 I think I always knew it would be a great opportunity and I daydreamed about it fleetingly, but it wasn't until about 6 months ago that I conciously began considering it as an option for myself. 

I got pregnant at 19 and dropped out of college to have the baby, and at the time I resigned myself to giving up many of the opportunities that exist for the 20 somethings and the unattached.  I thought I was prepared to give up everything for my little man.  Don't get me wrong, this child is a true blessing in my life and the reason for the air in my lungs and I would do ANYTHING for him, as any parent would.  But I've found in the last year or so, that my life was still missing something.  But what? I'd asked myself. 

I have a family, I have a home, I have reasonable financial stability....what more is there?  The missed opportunities haunted me.  The traveling I would never do,the freedom I would never have, those were the things I had lost.  Or thought I had. 

The exact moment when the realization of what I could do is uncertain.  I know that it was just weeks before I made the appointment to meet with a recruiter.  I suddenly had this buring desire to, of all things, be a trucker. 

I had been in customer service most of my life, because I was good at it.  I am good at it.  I enjoy making people feel good.  But a pattern had developed that took me 5 years to recognize.  I lost each of those customer service jobs.  I either took too many days off or I quit.  I was never truly satisfied with any of them.  At the time I would blame the company, but in all reality it was me. I hadn't found my niche. 

All of a sudden things started coming together....freedom, independence, security...the things I wanted, some I thought I could never have seemed to be falling into my lap as the reality of becoming a truck driver began to piece together. 

I met with Dave on a Friday.  He was delightful and helpful and full of information.  I couldn't sit still in my seat, I was so excited listening to him and looking at the posters of companies and trucks that devoured his walls.  He explained to me my options, he discussed the process of the course, the things I would study. He explained that the first week would be mainly in class time, studying the book and the rules, learning about log  books and tracking progress etc.  He explained the different driving techniques I would learn, practice and perfect.  Then, he took me on a tour of the range.  There was a class going on, and I as soon as I got a glimpse of the man in the drivers seat of that beautiful 18-wheeled monster of a machine, I was hooked.  I knew that I would HAVE to find a way to get behind one of those myself. 

The financing was my only concern. With neither myself nor my fiancee working, how would we afford the 6 grand it was going to cost?  I knew my options, but even getting financed with a downpayment seemed like an impossibility.  My nervous frustration began setting in.  I was blissfully optomistic as I drove home that afternoon. High on the realization that I had found something I actually WANTED to do, and the excitement that I might just be able to do it. 
I went home to discuss the situation with Michael, who is the MOST suypportive person I have ever met in my life.  We spent hours discussing the pro's and con's, the difficulties, the possibilities and everything in between.  We discussed our options financially as well and ultimately came to a conclusion. 

We would sell the Jeep and I would attend CDL CLASSES!!